Thank you!

I don't really know how to write this but I really want to, so I'm hoping it'll all just come out ok.

These last few years have been quite difficult for me. My mum died, home life was really tough, moving schools and so many other things I won't go into here - on top of everything applying to medical school and actually trying to get the grades! There have been so many times when everything seemed so horrible and the world was just black. I don't know how to explain it. I wanted to feel happy I really did but I just couldn't. I'd always have this constant nervousness and sadness even though there would often be no reason for it. Don't get me wrong, of course I did have days when I was happy, but for so long I felt like I was trapped in this unhappy place, while everyone else was enjoying life. However, this post isn't about all the upsetting things, this is about saying thank you, because throughout the time there have been two ridiculously special people. I know for sure that if it wasn't for them I wouldn't be here today. Not necessarily ending it, more I wouldn't be the person I am today. They were always there, through the good and the bad times, when I was panicking and crying but also when I was laughing and having fun. They always stuck by me and were just a face-to-face chat, Facebook message, phone call or email away. I can't say thank you enough to these people!

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People say their best friend is the best, but I can assure you they obviously haven't met Penny. She's the greatest person you could ever meet. Unbelievably kind, gorgeous, amazing fun and a brilliant listener. Every time I was upset even about the most trivial things, she was always there, making me laugh and stopping me worrying. I have some of the best memories of my life with her, even the most simple of things like eating dib dabs on the business park bench to the greatest things like going on our first holiday together to the Edinburgh Fringe. We were both so scared we wouldn't remain friends when we went to different sixth forms - how stupid we were!

The other person I'd like to say thank you to, and I know Penny will be able to guess this, is Mrs Hague. She's an insanely amazing teacher at the school I moved to for sixth form, and she's just so lovely. I trust her more than anyone in the entire world (except Penny of course!). I don't think she knows how much she's changed my life. I feel I could tell her pretty much anything; she's been like the mum I no longer have.

If you're in a dark place right now, I can promise you it will get better. Talk to someone you trust and you know will understand; you can always talk to these guys. I never believed I would feel happy again when I was about 14/15 but I can assure you with all my heart it is possible.

This post doesn't even begin to tell you how thankful I am for these people in my life, but it's a start. I know they may never read it, but I think it's really important to thank people, whether its due to something massive or the smallest of things that meant the world to you.

Thank you!

Lizzie